To deal with it alone or not alone… One very important thing about dealing with anxiety is that although it induces states of isolation, being alone is not always the best answer. I’m a pretty introverted individual who’s always up for alone time and doing my own thing. However, studies show that “social” time or being with friends/family can be very anxiety-relieving. Spending time with friends can actually lower your cortisol levels, which is a hormone that is released in stressful situations.
“They found that during an unpleasant experience, the kids who were with their best friend didn’t produce as much cortisol as kids who weren’t around a friend during the stressful time” (Chan, 2011)
When I think about it, friends really are the backbone to most of my happiest experiences. From going out together to do some hoodrat stuff to just doing dumb shit in our room together. After learning about how much of a positive impact friend time has on your mental and even physical health, I decided to spend the weekend fully immersed in my closest friendships. And let me tell you, it was fabulous!
My Friday’s are usually spent with my friends but it’s not much spending productive time together. It’s more like making dumb decisions after having one too many drinks (of juice duh) and getting home at an ungodly time. This Friday we dared to be a little different, mostly because one of us worked until 3am so we didn’t have much of choice. Because of this, my best friend and I thought it would be a great idea to have a girls night in with just the two of us. This was a great time to bond with my bestie (reducing those cortisone levels by the minute) by talking about personal struggles, telling funny stories, watching movies, eating, etc.
Knowing that I could just stay in my PJs with my hair looking a mess immediately lifted the stress and actual anxiety that courses through my mind when I have to try to look as good as everyone else that I see at parties. The night consisted of laughter and lots of Snapchat videos while we were both able to talk about things that have been on our chest lately or just random topics to get mind our mind off of those very things. This night was a real relief because I was able to just be my unfiltered self and let loose without caring about what others think of me which is my main issue with social events.
The next two days involved all of us (including that one guy who worked until 3 on Friday) spending quality time together. Instead of me staying in my room which is what I usually do when I need “no-school peace” on weekends, I dragged my butt to the living room to see what the other side feels like. When I spend too much time alone is when the anxiety can start to really kick in because of thoughts going in overdrive as soon as they get the opportunity. This did not occur when I was in company, and I almost can’t believe how much of a stressfree time these past few days were, despite all the work I had for school. We honestly did the most basic things like watch Netflix, do each other’s hair, make food together, but it was more about the feelings that came along with these moments. Although I do enjoy spending time alone, it’s not the smartest idea when I’m having a lot of anxiety because of the fact that I’m alone with my thoughts which have a way of eating me alive. 
I always had the mindset that most of my peace comes from being alone because I’m able to reflect and not be bombarded by others’ opinions. After this weekend, I learned that just being with people who I’m comfortable with and doing things that make us happy can bring one of the most innocent and pure forms of peace I’ve felt. Being with friends is a healthy distraction to thinking about the things that raise my cortisone levels. Instead, I talk and joke around or even have serious moments with people who care about my wellbeing. Even the day after was an anxiety-free one because of the impact from the prior nights.
This weekend was more than just a brief moment of relief, I actually found an effective way to relieve my anxiety which will extend to other moments of my life. And who doesn’t love fun with friends?!
https://www.huffpost.com/entry/best-friend-stress-levels_n_981080
In n out of anxiety 
I love that you got yourself out of the room to spend sometime with your friends. I live at home and on the weekends im just holed up in my room usually studying and doing homework. I almost only leave my room to eat, barely socialize with my family because I have so much work to do. Yesterday I actually spent sometime with my family because of my brothers birthday party and honestly I felt so much better!
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I’m glad you were able to discover how hanging with friends can really be a healthy stress reliever–as long as you guys aren’t doing anything illegal or anything along those lines lol. Being with your friends or even family can definitely get your mind off of things so i hope you keep doing that every once in a while! Another tip i encourage you to try is hitting the library with friends so you’re not stressed out alone and drive yourself crazy. Especially if you have a lot to work on and might be staying up late, having people in company will definitely help you stay up.
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The entire time I was reading your post, I kept going “omg me too!!!”. I can really relate to your experience, I can’t be alone for too long because I start sinking into anxiety and start thinking about things that just make me feel so ugh. Spending time with friends is a great way to distract yourself and just have a good time. I literally look forward to the days where I can spend a few hours with my friends because we spend the whole time laughing and doing stupid shit which is just a huge stress reliever. I love that you were able to find something that helps you with your anxiety. I really enjoyed reading your post and I look forward to reading more!
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Totally, and sometimes friends is like my American family. Thxgiving is approaching, and it is used to be miserable for me, because all the people around me can back home and spend their time with family, but I have no clue how I would spend my time here. Since last year, my friends invited me to celebrate thxgiving with them. Once, I had a lunch with my best friend Ruben and his family, they told me I need a home during the thxgiving they re willing to be my home. I mean now I have an American family.
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Wow, you have some great friends! I’m so happy you have an American family who you can enjoy thanksgiving with.
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I totally relate to wanting to be alone sometimes to destress and not have the pressure of being judged by other people, but I’ve also realized that being around the people you love and care about can lower anxieties and make you forget about any unwanted thoughts. And even if you can’t forget about them, you at least have people there to listen and give you reassurance and support. I’m so glad you enjoyed your weekend and found an effective way to deal with your stress and anxiety.
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Everything you said in this post is so true. Being down and isolated puts you in a depressing situation and sometimes makes you think about things that makes the situation even worse. Sometimes the key to making a bad day a lil better is to interact with people, especially your friends. It slaps you out of your bad feelings and makes you realize it’s not that bad and that you’re not alone.
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I love my alone time, like LOVE it. But when I’m feeling especially anxious or nervous about something my friends are the first people I go to to cheer me up! As nice as alone time can be, sometimes you just need to force yourself to go be social and laugh because your friends are literally like what you mentioned in your post, the backbone to your happiest memories! I love that each week you give really good advice to people who suffer from anxiety full-time or just on occasion. I was really happy to read that you had fun with your friends this weekend! Even just a night out or a day with your friends can impact your mood so so much! Great job girl:)
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It was so nice reading this post to see that you were able to find peace and enjoyment hanging out with your friends! It definitely made me miss my girlfriends from home because we do the same things like watch Netflix and make food together; it just creates such good vibes. I love being alone at times but I can definitely get too into my head and get worried about things. When I’m around my friends, I’m too busy laughing and having fun to think about anything troubling. I loved this post, really awesome job.
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